Monday, 2 November 2009

Creating change....

I notice as I write this Blog that it too has become a habit and at least it is conscious and I am choosing to do it. What is it to create the space in our lives to actually attract the people and the work and the experiences that we want? How many times do you tell yourself, I can't - because.. or what if this or that happens....or worse how many times to we play it safe, do we stay in employment or relationships because they are predictable, because we know what to expect from them, because we know how to do or's all rather dull really isn't it.

Wouldn't life me more exciting if we did the things we didn't know how to do? If we mixed with people we didn't know how to mix with, if we experienced things that we have never experienced before. It is true that we live our lives in patterns, as human beings we just do.... and there is something about the patterns that makes life 'easier', we don't have to think about it. Oh my God, if we don't have to think then we are unconscious - who wants to live and unconscious life where we just exist, repeating pattern after pattern every day, week, month and year.... that's not a life! It is an existence....

So, the first thing we have to do is to get conscious, right! Sounds easy doesn't it? And it is not.
We have spent years creating our behaviours our patterns our 'way of life' we have made decisions, maybe years ago, that are still having an impact on our lives today and will continue to have an impact on our lives tomorrow. So how do we change what we have manifested? Well the first thing we do is to simply notice, does the life you have created for yourself serve you?
Notice that I am not saying that it's good or bad or right or wrong (they are all judgements based upon what society or other people might think) Does the life you have created Serve you?

There are some very important words in that Question, 'the life you have created' and 'Does it Serve you'. Often we blame others or organisations, we become victims of circumstance rather than taking charge of our own lives and creating what we want in the world. Now, we all know that if it were that simple, we would all do it.... so what stops us?

Firstly, as I said earlier one has to be conscious, once we are conscious then we can notice if what we have created does serve us or not. If the answer is not, my guess is that there are some values that are not being honoured, so simply notice what those values are and once conscious then you can choose to do something differently in order to honour those values. Thats step two of course, making conscious choices (and noticing your intended impact along the way) - are your intentions good? Most of us have good intentions, most of us do not set out to hurt people or to make a mess - and we are human which means we make mistakes..... give yourself permission to make mistakes, you will learn lots and life will be much more exciting. We make decisions every day, in fact we make decisions every minute of every day, give yourself a break and let go of needing to be right.... more to write on this topic and that is another blog!

Once we are making conscious choices, we are clearly saying NO to things which create space in our lives for the things we want to say YES to. For example, if I am saying No to watching telly this evening that is because I am saying YES to going to Salsa. The YESES are meaningless without the NOs..... if we want to create something different then we have to say NO to the things that don't serve us. Of course, saying YES and NO to things and people that we have not said yes and no to before (or for a while anyway) will bring up emotions in yourself and other people, so stay awake (as Billy Connelly would say) and notice the impact of your choices. There is an opportunity to learn from your emotions, they are your bodys way of letting you know something, when strong emotions come up within us, it is our body that is trying to get our attention. Be with your emotions and don't try to fix them or make them go away, they have wisdom for you, if only you stay around long enough with them to notice what the wisdom is.

So, there you go, its that simple, get conscious, honour your values, be in conscious choice and be aware of your impact (intended/unintended) and live the emotional process of you life. Keep doing it every day, thats how to create change in your world and that's the way to have conscious intentional impact in the world.