Sunday 31 January 2010

What is it to lead from the inside out.....

I know there is juice in this inquiry even before I start to type....

I chose this inquiry because I realise that this is a very important subject for me, its about how I live my life and how I model the work that I do in the real world. In the last blog I felt as if I was being led from the outside in and when I processed that feeling (with my Coach) I described it as feeling like someone had a hold of the bottom of my stomach and was trying to turn me inside out! It was painful and it hurt, lots!

We are so much creatures of habit, I can't tell you and the more I do this work the more I realise that I am my very best example of humanity to practise this material on, my god, the learning never stops, its a good job that learning is a value of mine, right!

So, What is it to lead from the inside out.... well it is to ask for what you want and stick around long enough to see if you have to negotiate.... that's one thing that it is, its also about not be attached to specific outcomes...... it's about being open enough to know that whatever shows up, you can work with, in whatever form. So, what comes to me is that its about trust, trust in myself as an individual and as a human being, with flaws and all that comes with those flaws, its about trusting me in all the roles I perform, as a Daughter, a Sister, a Lover, a Coach, a Trainer, a Student, a Client and a Woman whatever role I am in, I know that I can rely on me.

A very good friend and respected leader once said to me, you know I look at life like this.
We are given a body, some time and the ability to choose - what we create from those three things basically defines the life we live! Think about that, It doesn't get more simple than that... some time, a body and the ability to choose!

So, what are you doing and how are you being - with your time, your body and your ability to choose?

What I am doing is, travelling, having fun, engaging in work that I am passionate about and staying focused on the impact I want to have on my world. How am I being along the way? I am being engaging, passionate, relaxed, courageous, funny, gentle, kind, bold and loving. Sometimes grumpy, sad and always authentic!

To lead from the inside out, is to be conscious and aware of what is going on outside of me, to see how the people and organisations around me are operating and to be conscious enough to know whatever they throw at me, I can create learning from it.... I can stay on course and keep a hold of myself on the inside, no matter what is happening on the outside. I can choose not to be derailed, just because something or someone on the outside of me has done something I don't like, or created some circumstances that I was not expecting....

To lead from the inside is to let go of, 'Just in case' or 'what if' and wasting energy focusing on things which have not happened yet, far better to be in the moment, enjoying that moment rather than spending time and energy on things that may or may not happen in the future. Don't get me wrong there are some things that we can predict, Death, old age, taxes, so yes have some strategies to cope with or prepare for these... The other stuff that your Gremlin makes up, let go of that, free yourself of the baggage and energy that it takes from you!

So, for me, to lead from the Inside out is to be clear about what is important to me, to honour my values, it is to take myself over my emotional edges (have the hard conversation, ask for what I want and ask others for what they want) even if it makes me feel uncomfortable, for the sake of being authentic and feeling the aliveness that I feel when I fully engage with my world, with myself, the people around me and my everyday interactions. For me it is to be in conscious powerful life giving choice!

I am blessed to have found the work I do, I thank God that my path was pointed in this direction and I am so proud of myself, that I have taken so many risks in order to find this aliveness in my life!

2 comments:

Knowledge Hooligan said...

Interesting insights Ronnie that have helped me, so thanks for sharing a bit of you. I come back to your blog often. It’s like a photo album but in written form that records your journey of self discovery. Each blog is a snapshot of your ‘self’ in context with your surroundings and life experiences.

I was reading your blog while listening to Brandi Carlisle's Turpentine (who said men can't multitask). Spookily it seemed to soulfully reflect aspects of "some time, a body and the ability to choose!" I couldn’t ignore the ‘sign’, the convergence between what I was seeing and what I was hearing opened me up to explore the concept you presented to us. So instead of sleeping I’ve been in my hotel room wondering, thinking, mulling, discovering. All without the aid of wine from the mini bar too.

"some time, a body and the ability to choose!" Alas, if only that was a universal truth. I really want to believe that it is. I’m desperate to believe that it is. It ought to be, but it isn't, sadly. The world is full of asymmetry and that means that there are loved ones that do not have those three simple things while others do.
However, what you have called “Leading from the inside out” is powerful and has helped me to understand and tune myself in to the needs of those that do not or may not have the time, or the body or the choice that perhaps you (my assumption) or I do. For someone very close to me, it was important for her to know if I will be around when life gets tough (the inevitability of time being depleted more quickly, diminishing the body, removing choices). My answer had to be authentic to me in order to be authentic to her. I’m glad that I went through this process. I’m glad my loved one was able to see how authentic my answer is. So while she is able, my loved one is showing her leadership from within to make the best of her time, her body and her ability to choose, courageous in the knowledge that this will change.

Ronnie Clifford (MCC, TLCC, CPCC) said...

Wow, Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts, opinions and views on my blog. I'm pleased if it gives you the opportunity to reflect and learn, in the same way it creates that opportunity for me.

I am always fascinated by your wisdom. Thanks you for sharing.
Respectfully, Ronnie